One of my most favorite things in the world is being a momma. It is all I ever wanted to be. I gave up several opportunities to do other things including recording Christian music and college to do so. I never wanted to be famous, or make millions of dollars. I just wanted to be a mom.

I take the job very seriously still to this day, so it shouldn’t surprise you that before my kids were born I have prayed for each of them and in that season of prayer, as I carried them in my womb, I felt that God gave me a scripture for each child. I didn’t ask for this, it just came to me. A strong impression that this is for the particular child I was carrying at the time. I knew each verse would represent my child, this little creature growing inside me. I don’t know how I knew, but I just did.

Over the 35 yrs I have been a mother. It has been amazing to watch each child grow into their own person. I’ve also seen each one begin to represent and have situations come into their life that have helped them play out the scriptures that God gave me for each one before they were even born.

You know there is a famous song written by Mark Lowery and made famous by many people called “ Mary Did You Know?” It asks the question “Mary did you know your baby boy would one day walk on water?” , Mary did you know that your baby boy would save our sons and daughters?” Did you know your baby boy had come to save the earth. This little child your holding would soon deliver you” Mary did you know?”


You have to wonder, Did Mary know? I can only speak for myself, but I knew God has given me the scriptures for each of my children. Each one is unique and different just like each of my children. But, I have to say when God gave me the scripture for our oldest son Lee. I never dreamed it would play out like it has. HIs verse was 1 John 3 Beloved I wish above all else that you may prosper and be in good health even as your soul prospers”

When I first read this verse, I focused on the prosper part, because after all, Don’t we all want our kids to prosper? I dreamed one day he would be rich and help so many people. I also think I kind of took the “and be in good health” part for granted. After all, no parent ever wants their kid to be sick. But it is something I pondered in my heart and honestly still do to this day. I wondered how the part of him being in good health even as his soul prospers would play out.

I also recall a scripture in the bible that talks about pondering It is in Luke 2. It is at the part of the story of Jesus’ birth where the angels appeared to the shepherds and they have just shown up at the manger, telling what they have heard and saw from the angels then they fall on their face and worship little baby Jesus. But the bible says “Mary treasured all these things, pondering them in her heart” Luke 2:19 NASV

Imagine how Mary felt, its estimated she was somewhere between 13-16 yrs old. She is alone except for being with her future husband, who forgot to make reservations at the local hotel, and she is giving birth to her first child all on her own. Then these strangers show up,, and not just any strangers but shepherds who were considered just above women in those days, they were some of the lowest of the low in society standards of that day and time. They were dirty and stuck, and my guess is also ill mannered since they spent most of their time around sheep.

And the bible says “She pondered these things in her heart” What does that mean? Well, the Ellicott’s Commentary for English Readers says:

“She could not as yet understand all that had been said and done, but she received it in faith, and waited till it should be made clear. It was enough for her to know that her Child was, in some sense, the Son of God and the hope of Israel.”

You know I kind of feel that way about the scripture that God gave me for our son Lee, if you aren’t aware he had a massive heart attack in September and is going in for heart surgery soon to try to repair some of the blockages. So the whole health part of the scripture God has given me, some 35 yrs ago, has suddenly captured my attention.

Now, I don’t believe Lee is sick because his soul hasn’t prospered, He is a follower of Christ and loves God with His whole heart and I also realize the part of that commentary talking about knowing the Child was in some sense , the Son of God and the hope of Israel. Doesn’t really pertain to Lee as well, because he is far from being Jesus Christ after all he is human.

But I do relate to the fact that I have received it in faith, and I am waiting till it becomes clear to all of us. I do, though, believe that Lee’s healing will come the closer he draws to God and that He is alive today because of the relationship he had with Christ the day his heart attack happened. God has a plan for Lee.

See, Lee wasn’t even supposed to be born. I was told when he was 3 yrs old that I should have never had him and I certainly wouldn’t have any more children. But the fact is,, I did go on to have 2 more children. Lee was born and so far has lived 35 yrs and I am confident he will go on and live many more years.

Now did having children happen exactly the way I had it planned? No! But it happened in God’s plan His timing. Did I get discouraged along the way, Yes! As I think probably about the time the shepherds showed up at the manger. My guess is Mary might have been a little exasperated. She might have been thinking “What in the world just happened?” She might have been asking “What is going on?” .” Is this even possible?” She might have been second guessing her ability to do this thing God had called her to do. But just at the right time, the shepherds showed up to remind her God was there- He was watching, He had not left her, He was still working His plan and using her in part to fulfill it. Those dirty stinky uneducated shepherds was a reminder that God was working His plan!

What do you feel lost about today? What plans do you have that you feel like are falling apart. I want to remind you. If you feel God has told you something, but nothing seems to be going right? Then just ponder that in your heart. Just at the right time, it will be revealed. Trust Him! Believe what He has told you by faith and wait for it to become clear!

Alesa Lewis Miller is the former Pastor’s wife of Lighthouse Worship Center in Greensburg KS. Now she and her husband are US Missionary Candidates with the Assemblies of God. To find out more about the Miller’s new adventure go to http://www.millers4usmissions.com or read more stories at http://www.behindtheparsonagewalls.com.