Very eventful morning so far… Made it through the dentist appointment without Amy threatening the Dentist “That if he didn’t stop she was gonna call her daddy and he was gonna come in his big red Cadillac with his shotgun and shoot him” (Just FYI don’t change the story of the 3 little pigs to your kids names and have you come in your big red Cadillac to rescue them) That visit (when she was 5) got us sent promptly to a new dentist. 🙂 Now that we are home Chad has proceeded on to the cremation of Annie the Anole… She was loved by many, Cherished by all and eaten by none. (referring to the Blizzard report a few weeks ago) Have a great day!

Recently, I called a friend of mine and said, “Will you go by such-and-such address and pick up a vacuum cleaner for me?  It will be sitting by the curb.”  Without hesitation or question, her response was, “Sure!”  We continued our conversation about other things in our lives and then, before we hung up, she said, “I trust you and everything, but tell me again, why am I picking up this vacuum cleaner?”

At that point I explained to her that I belong to a free recycling group online and someone was giving it away.  (She lives in a small town about 15 miles from me, and the vacuum cleaner was in her town.)

As I pondered our conversation later, I thought, “You know, that is the way I feel about God sometimes.  I often think, but maybe never say it, ‘God, I trust you and all, but, tell me again:  Why I am doing this?’”

God never promised us as Christians we would not have any struggles.  Sometimes we are tempted to doubt and give up.  As home-schooling parents, there are days when it is just not easy and we may even question “Why are we doing this again?”  But Gods word promises that if we are faithful with little He will give us much.  When we stand in faith through the trials God gives us, He will give us so much more influence on those around us.  There is never anything we go through but what, if we will only allow God to use what we go through, he will open up the doors for us to help others from what we have learned through our challenges.

Some days, life can just be overwhelming and we would rather stay in the bed and pull the covers over our head.  But we know if we do, our children will not get the education they need, let alone the nourishment and guidance they need for the day.  (Besides, they might burn down the house if we stay there!)  It is on those days that if we will just pick ourselves up and do what we are called to do, it may very well be the most successful day we have had in a long time.

You have to admit, there is nothing better than when you work with your kids for an extended period of time to learn their multiplication tables, spelling words etc. and they succeed!  What an awesome feeling of success!  Not only for them, but for us!  Or, maybe it is just them showing their giving, loving heart and kindness to others.  Whatever the success, we have had a part in it.

Perhaps your child has special challenges – perhaps in some areas they may not ever be able to learn and you ask yourself, “Why are we doing this again?”  Don’t ever forget, these children we have are God’s greatest blessings we have ever been given and God has called you to be their greatest influence.

Don’t give up!  Continue to be faithful!  Remember, when we are faithful with what we are given, God will give us great influence on those around us.  There is nothing that comes to you that doesn’t pass by God first.

Our family has a personal struggle going on in our lives right now, and as I shared it with a friend of mine the other day, she responded, “Well, we will pray for Gods will.”  I told her flat out, “Honestly, I don’t want God’s will right now!  I want my will and my will is that my child be perfect and succeed at whatever he puts his hands to do.”  It was an honest answer, but reality is, if I trust God, I have to be faithful in my trust to him in this trial, even though I don’t see why our circumstances have to be this way.  But I trust God enough to know, that as I hold onto his hand, I will see His will and purpose in this situation and I will be greatly influential for Him because of it.

Your greatest influence sits at your feet today.  They believe you are the most amazing person they know (even if they never tell you).  God has called you to be an influence on all you come in contact with …..  and that is why you’re doing this!

Happy Valentines Day…. But remember Love is not a “feeling” it is a “Verb” a “Choice” we make each day to do or not to do…. and it is best described below….

1Cor 13:4-8

4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 8 Love never fails

Originally written for  The Old Schoolhouse Magazine Facebook Page  Saturday, January 15, 2011 at 2:36pm

So I went to check my facebook the other day, when all of the sudden I see a friend who I have not talked to since I was probably 13 years old was asking to be my friend on facebook! Of course, I confirmed her and then messaged her asking, “How in the world did you find me?”. Later on that day as we were instant messaging each other, she explained she has been looking for me for a long time! She said, “I could never find you on facebook, so I googled your name and found you through one of the articles you had written … ” I was astonished to hear those words! Why would anyone on earth, look for me for such a long time? REALLY‼ I am not that important; I have never really felt I have done anything of great importance in my life, and yet this person valued me enough that she would “Look” for me and not quit until she found me and I didn’t even owe her money! LOL!!!

I could not help but think, sometimes don’t we feel that way about God. Astonished to think He would send His only Son to die on a cross for us so that we could have eternal life with Him. The very fact we were created because He wanted a relationship with us is overwhelming to say the least.

I have to ask… As homeschooling parents how are we teaching our children that God pursues them? That He loves them with an immeasurable love? How do we make our kids realize he is more crazy about them, then even we are?

Sometimes it is hard for little ones to see just how much God loves them when they see us as their sole provider. When we realize what God has done for us, We can then begin to allow them as children to see where we have come from and what God has done for us. As parents, let’s not forget to be transparent to our kids and allow them to see the victories God brings in our lives. As we testify of God’s love for us then they can see His work in our lives and begin to look for it in their own, and, like a domino effect, then share with their friends and so on.

I realized this had happened in our lives, this year, when our 15 yr-old daughter got a small babysitting job, 2 times a month. We have always been open with our kids that as we have been financially faithful to God, He has always blessed us back. We never told our kids they HAD to tithe. But as soon as our daughter got her job, I looked over at church one Sunday to see her filling out a tithing envelope. The next thing I notice was she begins to get more jobs and, in a conversation with her, she told me that she realized what worked for Mom and Dad, was really working for her. Then the opportunity came for our family to financially assist another family during the holiday season, so they would not lose their home. Amy was the first to step up and want to help.

For generations, even going back into Bible days, the testimonies of God’s faithfulness in lives have been shared by word of mouth and action. Let’s not forget to do that with our kids, Let’s not forget to encourage them with our actions in their daily lives and allow them to see what God is doing for us through His faithfulness. I believe then it will naturally be passed on to others so they can meet this awesome Savior who we love and who so GREATLY loves us.

Have you ever felt like you wanted to just quit, and holler re-do, or just hit the reverse button on this life altogether?

I have!  It has been one of those days…… no weeks…..no months……. OK! really a couple of years.

Between finding out our youngest has some learning disabilities, a job loss ( still unemployed after 2yrs), being responsible for the care of my handicapped elderly mother, and now finding out that a 14yr  hope, dream and vision that we know God wants us to do,  appears to be on hold once again!  I have come to my wits end.

I am wondering; what’s the next step and where do we go? What do we do? What did we do wrong? My head is spinning with questions of uncertainty. What curriculum to use for my child now? Have I already screwed him up? How are we going to pay for the special curriculum? Am I really this bad of a parent? Will the next phone call I get be that my mother is gone?  What have I done so wrong that God has allowed me to go through this? The questions are endless and so are the accusations the devil flies at me.

I feel my family has been on a long journey, a wandering in the wilderness per say for the last 11yrs. All I want is a “normal” life.

So I go to the Word.  I open the bible to Joshua 5. Here are the children of Israel,  those promised the Promised Land.  They have wandered in the wilderness for 40yrs on the hope and dream of a promise their parents had only talked about.  All this generation knows is God’s provision, simply that God covers them with a cloud by day to keep them cool in the desert and provides a fire by night to keep them warm. Manna falls from the sky to feed them. All these people have known is God’s provision and that they have been promised a land flowing with milk and honey.

Think about it, all these people (about 2.5 million) and all but Caleb and Joshua, have now only eaten manna all their lives, they have known nothing but God’s provision for every part of their life. Every part of their day and night for the last 40 yrs, literally all their lives, has been about getting to the Promised Land. Now they have just crossed the Jordan River (on dry land, another provision of God) they can see the Promised Land and God tells them to make a camp,  celebrate the passover and get circumcised. They can see what God has promised them and the scripture says……

Joshua 5:12 And the manna ceased on the morrow after they had eaten of the old corn of the land; neither had the children of Israel manna any more; but they did eat of the fruit of the land of Canaan that year.

THAT YEAR!!!! Really ???? Is it saying they waited a year???  A YEAR???? Seriously??? Here they are they can see what God has promised them and they have to sit there and look at it for a year. Not to mention the fact all their men have just been circumcised, makes them kind of a vulnerable spot to be in. I mean really I am sure not too many of them are going to feel like going out to war anytime soon.  Let alone how embarrassing this might have been to them.

I wonder, how many of us feel embarrassed about something in our past. Maybe it is something that you feel like you have failed at. Is it the feelings of  inadequacy  when teaching your children?  Is it a stupid mistake you made in your past? Maybe you handled a family situation badly, or you had a business deal gone wrong?

If you go back up and read Joshua 5:9 it says….

Joshua 5:9 And the LORD said unto Joshua, This day have I rolled away the reproach of Egypt from off you…..

Some of the definitions for Reproach are:

1. to find fault with (a person, group, etc.); blame;

2. blame or censure conveyed in disapproval

3. disgrace, discredit, or blame incurred: to bring reproach on one’s family.

4. a cause or occasion of disgrace or discredit.

Maybe you have been made to feel ashamed by other people or your family because you homeschool. Maybe you blame yourself because you have a special needs child. Maybe you’re disgraced because what you dream of as a perfect life has not come to pass. Perhaps you blame yourself for some accident  you had no control over.

God says that He has removed the reproach from you. Before any of us can enter into our Promised Land we have to accept that forgiveness. Forget the shame that has been placed on us for whatever reason.  We have to realize that the best for us is just ahead. We are not washed up and our life is not over, we have a new beginning in front of us, if we will only accept it.

We can stand up and hold our heads high, we are children of God and the truth is that we are valuable to Him, we are His children. If you had a precious diamond ring that was perhaps passed down to you from your family and it had been valued as a priceless gem, would that gift be any less valuable if you got it a little dirty? Perhaps you dropped it in a mud puddle and you had to pick it up and clean it off… is it still a valuable precious gift to you? Of course it is! The same  with us; we are God’s precious gift  and maybe we have fallen in a mud puddle, maybe we have even been rolled over or stepped on, but we are still a priceless treasure to God. In the end when we stand before Him, do we want man’s approval or His?

Maybe you have been waiting on that “Promised Land”, whatever it is for you in your life, and it seems like once again you’re on hold.

The reassuring part to this story for me is threefold. 1.  God provides. The whole time, in the wilderness God provides. So no matter what we’re going through, whatever wilderness we may feel like we are in, God will provide. 2. They do make it to the promised land. God does not leave them hanging, but He sees them through. 3. We have nothing to be ashamed of.. The past is the past,  Gods word says, forgetting those things behind me I press on…I reach forth… Basically, we keep going! God is about to bring you to a higher ground!

Whether you are in the middle of what feels like a 40yr wilderness journey , or you maybe so close, can see what God has promised you and yet you have to sit outside and wait before you can reach it. Know this …. That today, whatever your wilderness, whatever your Promised Land whatever your battle… God will provide, He will see you through to the other side and you WILL come out victorious! You are a priceless, valuable treasure to God and He loves you.

And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not. Galatians 6:9

The phone rang and when I answered, it was my son. He was in college about 200 miles away. When he says ” You’re not going to believe what just happened to me?” I respond ” What?” He replies ” Well, I just came out of Wal-mart and I found this note on my car, it is someone accusing me of denting their car with mine, and it says I had better call him right away or he is going to come after me” Wow! I was taken aback, this was the first time that our son, after graduating from homeschooling had ever faced a challenge like this and so far from home. A little bit of fear came over me, so I asked ” Well, did you call him?” My son boldly replied ” NO! and I am not going to, because obviously he does not know, who I am or who my momma is, or who my friends are.” (my son has 3 friends that are lawyers) I was amazed by my son’s boldness. He never called and nothing ever came of the issue.

Since then, it is not uncommon for you to hear anyone in my family say ” Obviously, you don’t know who my momma is”… or “Obviously, you don’t know who I am.”. with our heads bobbing and maybe even a finger or 2 snapping. We mostly do it in jest, but the point is well taken.

My son could stand there in that parking lot, 200 miles away from his greatest support system (family) with a uncommon boldness, because he knew, I had his back no matter where he was, or what the issue was. He has seen more than once his momma go to bat for him in different situations. He also knew legally he has friends in high places that could take care of him if something came up and most importantly he knew he had a God that he served who loved him and would assure the truth would come out.

As I have pondered that conversation, I have asked myself “How often do we take that same stand, when trouble comes our way?” or when we are challenged with a new issue concerning our child?

Maybe, we suddenly find out our child has a learning disability or illness comes into our lives that we do not answers for or there is just some subject that our child is not understanding and we have tried all we know to do and they still are not getting it. Maybe our husband has been unemployed for months and we’re not for sure how were going to pay the bills.

As homeschoolers we are typically very independent. If there was not some independence in us, most of us would not have had the guts to even start homeschooling. But what we have to remember in everything we do, we are children of God, our Heavenly Father owns cattle on a 1,000 hills.

John 1:12Yet to all who received him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of GodRomans 8:17Now if we are children, then we are heirs heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory.

And as much as you love and care for your child, God cares for your babies even more than you do. (no matter what their age) He has a plan for those children and even when we do not understand why God would allow these learning or physical challenges to happen, we can’t see the purpose in any of it and the thought of what will happen in the future for them overwhelms us with fear. It is at those times, we need to tell the devil. “You obviously do not know who my Heavenly Father is!.”

Jer 29: 11 Says. For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end. He promised that before we were even born he knew us and has great plans for us.   Jer 1:5 Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee; and before thou camest forth out of the womb I sanctified thee, and I ordained thee a prophet unto the nations.

The question is who are we trusting? My son trusted enough to know that no problem could come his way that was too big to handle.  So if a 20 yr old kid 200 miles away from home can stand with that kind of confidence and faith, so can we!

We may not have all the answers, we may not be able to figure out what the future holds, but we know who holds the future, and that is Jesus Christ our Lord and Heavenly Father. A father who is not just a “father” but he is our “Daddy”.  He is in control and we can have the faith and confidence to know that there is nothing that is coming our way that he doesn’t know already about and  he has already figured out a way to get us out of it!.

1 Corinthians 10:13 There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it.

So remember the next time the devil tries to control you by bringing thoughts of fear and uncertainty to your mind. Just stand up boldly and confess,

“Obviously, you don’t know how my Daddy is!”

Ok! We have all had those days where nothing goes right! The house is a disaster, the yard needs tending, the children are all sick at once, and company is on their way over for dinner…. Or maybe it does not even need to be that extreme for you, perhaps just simply dishes left out on the counter or the laundry not put away. What does it take to set you off?

My family has seen me at my worst and at my best. My worst being when my head spins around on my neck and I talk in that deep angry, sort of scratchy voice that sounds like it came out of some horror movie. OK! Maybe it’s not that bad, but bottom line is we all have our buttons that when pushed, can send us over the edge.

I remember an especially bad day when all 3 of my children were still living at home, (I have 2 left at home now) I was going off on my children in that voice from out of the horror movie when the phone rang. I immediately picked it up and turned into that loving wonderful person that everyone sees when I am outside my house and said in the most pleasant voice, “Hello this is the Miller residence, how can I help you?”

Boy, how quickly we can turn it on and off? Oh! we blame it on PMS or maybe being of some ethnic race that is known for a bad temper, and worst yet… if my family would just ______! You can fill in the blank of the unmet expectations. But yet we have the power when it might be embarrassing to us, to turn it off, to present a pleasant family atmosphere in the presence of others.

We have all heard the saying “If momma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy”. That famous saying alone should make us realize how powerful we are as women in our homes.

We have incredible powers that can be used for good or evil.

We all have had the days like described above, (unless maybe your Mrs. Duggar). But if you think about it, we also have the power to change our atmosphere with the words we speak. We are atmosphere changers!

I dare you to just be aware of the mood you are in, in your house and watch what happens.

Proverbs 31

25 Strength and honor are her clothing;
She shall rejoice in time to come.
26 She opens her mouth with wisdom,
And on her tongue is the law of kindness.
27 She watches over the ways of her household,
And does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 Her children rise up and call her blessed;
Her husband also, and he praises her:
29 “ Many daughters have done well,
But you excel them all.”
30 Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing,
But a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised.
31 Give her of the fruit of her hands,
And let her own works praise her in the gates.

As woman we are amazing, we can cook a meal, do laundry, care for 6 children, clean the house and change the oil in the car, all at the same time without blinking.

God has given most of us the ability to multi-task, we are like the latest and greatest computers that can handle 15 different things at one time, where most men are more like filing cabinets and can only focus on one thing at a time.

I realize sometimes under all the hats that we wear, we are bound to feel the stress and pressure. What I want to purpose is how we handle that pressure. I believe if we put the scripture to use and follow what it says. Take a deep breath and think before we speak. We can have a more pleasant home to live in. OK! Maybe we will never be the “June Cleavers” of our day. But, personally this is something the Lord has been speaking to me about and as I have practiced this concept over the past several months with my family, I am amazed as I have seen the tension in my moods reflect to my kids and my husband. But when I approach something in a pleasant and calm matter it reflects to my family as well. I want the new saying in my home to be, “Because Momma is Happy, Everybody is Happy”.

That doesn’t mean that we are not going to have times of discipline and disappointment, but I think what I have had to do is ask myself in what attitude am I going to respond in. A firm hand can still be given in calm voice. It is all about the attitude in which we approach an issue.

Proverbs 15

1 A soft answer turns away wrath,
But a harsh word stirs up anger.
2 The tongue of the wise uses knowledge rightly,
But the mouth of fools pours forth foolishness.
3 The eyes of the LORD are in every place,
Keeping watch on the evil and the good.
4 A wholesome tongue is a tree of life,
But perverseness in it breaks the spirit.
5 A fool despises his father’s instruction,
But he who receives correction is prudent.
6 In the house of the righteous there is much treasure,
But in the revenue of the wicked is trouble.
7 The lips of the wise disperse knowledge,
But the heart of the fool does not do so.
13 A merry heart makes a cheerful countenance,
But by sorrow of the heart the spirit is broken.
14 The heart of him who has understanding seeks knowledge,
But the mouth of fools feeds on foolishness.
18 A wrathful man stirs up strife,
But he who is slow to anger allays contention.
28 The heart of the righteous studies how to answer,
But the mouth of the wicked pours forth evil.
33 The fear of the LORD is the instruction of wisdom,
And before honor is humility.

We’ve got the “POWER” the question is “How are we going to use it?